5 TIPS TO KEEP YOUR MARRIAGE

Most marriages strive for “happily ever after,” a concept popularized by Walt Disney’s filmmaking. However, this ideology has thwarted the realities of many 21st-century marriages, leaving couples in shambles and despair. But Disney can’t take it all.

With the broad array of technical breakthroughs and the “live fast, die young” chase of unfettered money, marriages in the twenty-first century are not only on the verge of collapse, but are disintegrating.

Because 21st-century marriages lack the endurance that led to their fragile nature, here are five indicators plus extras to maintaining a successful marriage in the 21st century.

1. 1. 1. Patience: 21st-century marriages lack this virtue and are eager to grow without nurture. When discussing how to preserve the fragility of 21st-century marriages, patience is essential. Patience has now gone out the door in 21st-century relationships and should be reintroduced since it is the lifeblood of many partnerships. Some people enter marriage expecting the worst and are not prepared to wait for the best.
      2. It’s a fallacy; no one completes you. The notion of a better half completing you is an illusion and one way to sustain your marriage in the 21st century is to withdraw such philosophy. Expecting someone to complete you is a big shoe to fill. This is the beginning of bigger troubles if one partner isn’t meeting up with the other partner in terms of “completing”. Be the best for you, someone will meet you while you are working on your wholeness and all will align.
      3. Compatibility; Physical attraction is great but there is a bigger fish to fry like seeking out compatibility and other non-tangible alluring characteristics in a partner.
      4. Investment/commitment to your marriage. It is clear that the hardship 21st-century marriages are faced with, tentatively due to the lack of commitment, reveals itself through cracks in the marriage. The partners do not give time for the marriage to blossom into maturity. Recall that the wedding vows did not promise perfection, but juxtaposed complementary opposites. “For better for worse”, ” For richer for poorer”.
      5. Selflessness; Be selfless to your partner that way you both put each other’s needs at the top of the list.

   Like staying in shape needs an individual to actually work on exercising and dieting, always work on your marriage. Researchers have seen that the happiest time couples are the happiest in their marriage is as newlyweds. Afterwards,  the feelings plummet and that’s what researchers termed a “downward trajectory in marriage satisfaction”. This rises from the recurring fights and arguments that are bound to take place. Don’t wait till there is a pileup or resentment to work on your marriage. Always work on it from the get-go.

2. Additionally, learn how to fight. Bickering is no stranger to couples, but you should learn how to have disagreements as a couple. How do you do this? By taking into perspective the other partner’s point of view and figuratively wearing the shoes to know where it pinches. Getting off that high horse leaves you glued to your viewpoint and being open to your partner’s opinions which would lead to the convergence of agreement.